I had never really considered it, but evidently I came to this parenting thing later than a lot of folks. I am an AARP member and my daughter is a sophomore in college.
I have had some fellows several years younger than I am, whose daughters are the same age as mine, ask me about issues with raising a daughter. Evidently a lot of them have difficulty with their daughter's dating habits. I have been amazed at the lack of thought they have given to an issue that was bound to arise.
I was 34 when my daughter was born. Old enough to have established myself as an adult but not too old to recall what I was like as teenage male. If, as the father of a daughter you wait until she is old enough for boys to be interested in her to consider your responsibilities, then shame on you.
When she was 12 I began my program to insure that any potential suitors would be aware of my existence and possess some sense of what they considered to be my nature. Straight up, I made sure they feared me. This would have been in 7th grade so by the time high school rolled around the groundwork was well and truly laid.
I let her start her dating career with groups. I would drop her off and pick her up. I didn't have to speak to anyone, but I made sure they were cognizant of my presence. By the time she and the young men who had the nerve to ask her out were old enough to drive, there was not really an issue of trust nor expectations. I didn't trust any of them and they knew what to expect if my daughter was not home at the appointed time.
I never threatened any of these young fellows. I told them there were only 4 things they needed to know. The first was curfew. The rest were merely details; I am over 50, I own guns, and I have a compost pit. If they weren't bright enough to recognize that the consequences of their actions would be much more long-lived than mine then they would never make the cut.
Papa Tango 6, out
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